Whatever Happened to Bosoms?

When I was a girl (and kept a dinosaur for a pet in the back yard) women of a “certain age” had bosoms. These remarkable features must have developed at about forty. “Ample” bosoms would precede women into the room, conferring a certain dignity and gravitas. The last time I recall these kinds of bosoms must have been in the late ‘60s or early ‘70s.

Bosoms were not the shape of women’s chests/breasts today. They were usually large, shapeless, and ideal for holding handkerchiefs, folded money, or the occasional change purse. An English teacher of mine had an extraordinary bosom – she used it as a book rest in class. We tried not to giggle but we barely had breasts, let alone bosoms.

My theory is that bosoms were created by the corsets of the period, which were one-piece garments like swimsuits (except with no crotch so you could pee without getting undressed).

The clothing that went with bosoms was usually a taffeta or silk slip (usually of some pastel color or black) paired with a translucent dress that went with the slip. I remember indistinct patterns something like the camo prints of today. Then there were stockings, of course. (Held up with elastic garters or attached to the corset with little clippy things.) Then shoes usually by “Enna Jetticks”, which were lace up, square toed, with low “Spanish heels”.

I can think of dozens of women of my childhood acquaintance who dressed exactly like this, and it must have been some sort of rite of passage that after you got over a “certain age” you adopted this costume.

Today, in place of bosoms, we have breasts. Everywhere. Enlarged, reduced, lifted, tucked – on display by women who, in an earlier age, would have had bosoms ruthlessly strapped down, tucked in, and constrained forever more.

No doubt we are more comfortable. But, alas, there are no women now who remind me of the prow of a ship.